An Open Letter to Jill Davenport

Dear Jill,

I know you did not realize it, but, this morning was the last time that 
I will ever kiss your sweet little puppy head. 




 
Today you are moving in with your new family and I can honestly say that
I will never forget the short time we had together! 


Yes, we may have gotten off to a rough start -- you can't entirely blame us for that, though... 
You WERE cross-eyed and twice Jack's size (always hogging mama's milk for yourself!)


anndd you used to poop and pee on people!!! 

Pobre Emily

A baby squirrel Jill killed and dragged into the house

But now you are a fluffy ball of golden cuteness. 


You learned to jump on and off the couch before Jack, because you are not afraid. You let us scratch your belly without squirming and sticking your arms out at weird angles. Even if we aren't petting or playing with you, sometimes you like to just cuddle up next to us and take a nap. 

 
I guess what I am trying to say is: Ashley, Emily and I are really going to miss you. 
I am not sad because I know you are moving in with a new family who already loves you so much! 
I just hope you are happy there and that you will never forget the first family you had.

Love,
Marcella (the blackest one) 

One of those weeks

Oh hey there. It's me. I am still alive ...barely.

I have been kind of MIA recently because my school/work schedule has turned my life 

I actually think I could manage if all I had to do was go to school and work,

but there are a few things that throw the whole thing out of wack -- 

you know, eating, sleeping, driving, having a social life... to name a few.

I am pretty sure I have bitten off more than I can chew (something I will
rarely admit), but for now I am just going to keep chewing.

 Until I throw up or something. 

Needless to say, I have been slacking on the whole Day Zero Project.

There's a goal that I have been working on, but it is one of those things

you need to work on for a few days. I will try and finish up soon, I promise!

Ta ta for now. I hope your autumn is getting off to a better start than mine.

Can't wait to wake up tomorrow ( at 6 AM...) and guzzle down one of these:

P.S. Does it make it any better that I kind of love all of my classes?

♥

The Quarter to End all Quarters

Tomorrow is the first day of my last quarter at UCSB.

YESSSSSSSSSSSS.

I mean, this place is great and all, but it is hard to feel nostalgic for my 

soon-to-be-over college experience when I know that I will be spending

 the following six months exploring all of South America. 

I  just cannot wait to live in Chile and spend my days...

 perfecting my spanish by talking to complete strangers, strolling around the outdoor fruit markets in Santiago, traveling to exotic places like Ancient Machu Picchu in Peru, taking wild bus rides through the insanity that is Bolivia, and living it up during Brazil's legendary Carnival.

Oh yeah and studying. Hah.

Did I mention Chile is famous for its wine? 

There are still plenty of things I am looking forward to during the next four months in 

Santa Barbara. Here are some Day Zero goals I hope to accomplish before I leave:

093. Vote in an election
095. Read an issue of the New York Times, cover to cover
086. Touch a giraffe
084. Do a handstand
077. Enter a contest
005. Cook a meal for a large group of people

073. Make another music video

074. Spend an entire day without speaking

075. Make a toast

063. Spend the day with a child
045. Take a ballet class
055. Read a novel in Spanish
054. Memorize a bible scripture that I love
041. Make myself a scarf
039. Do the UCSB Undie Run
033. Throw a huge party
028. Visit San Francisco
014. Go on a hike
020. Have a picnic
016. Play paintball
003. Eat at an upscale restaurant alone

Speaking of my Day Zero Project, here is a little update: I have accomplished 37 goals in 332 days. 

A little over a third of my goals in a little under a third of the time I am alloted. Perfect!

 The downside: this means, according to goal #100: Deposit $5 in my savings account

 for every goal I DO complete, I should have 185-Day-Zero-dollars saved up. HAHAHA. 

The problem with having money in my bank account is that... I spend it! It is wayyy to easy to just swipe my card and voila-- dresses/makeup/lattes/groceries! To solve this issue, I have decided that I am going to keep a jar full of my Day Zero Project money. No spending allowed. I am not sure yet what I will do with the cash once I am done... save it? give it? spend it? (spend it!) 

I guess that is something I will decide on Day Zero. 

♥

Finding Peace

I just finished a pretty cool assignment

(my first of the quarter, actually) for COMM 162,

Communication and Peace. The class is quickly becoming

one of the best ones I have taken at UCSB. My assignment was

to write a 2-page explanation (in bullet form!) of my definition of peace.

Pretty awesome, right?

I don't know if you know this, but I am kind of a hippie.

I get lost in thought very easily and tonight I am pretty sure I put way

more thought and energy into this assignment than my professor wanted.

At the end, we were supposed to provide examples from real life of

something we believe communicates peace. I thought I should share one of mine.

When I was younger, before I even knew that UCSB existed,

my family and I used to take day trips to Santa Barbara. We would go for Mother's day or even

just a beautiful sunny day in the spring or summer. We would walk around State St.,

shop, eat, enjoy Santa Barbara's natural and architectural beauty, and then drive home.

There was one time that we went for Mother's day

that I remember in particular. I was probably 13 or 14 years old

(Actually I think my dad commented, "I think there's a college around here...

Maybe you can go Cella?" Me: "Yeah rightttt!" Hehe. Silly girl).

Our wanderings in Santa Barbara that day are blurry now,

but something I will never forget is the drive home.

♥ ♥ ♥

My dad drove and my mom sat in the back, with us niglets

(Dad's word, not mine!). This is a rarity in my family so us girls

jumped on the opportunity to annoy our mother in every possible way;

chatting her ear off, lying all over her, and the like.

I remember vividly a specific moment that occurred somewhere during

the two-hour duration of the drive. Our drowsiness finally set in and

everyone was silent, the radio hardly audible. The pacific ocean shone

brightly out the window as we hurtled down the 101 and I was resting

my head against my mom's cool shoulder, to the right.

Suddenly, as I weaved in and out of sleep, my eyes filled with tears.

I did not want anyone to notice so I quickly blinked them away,

but I could not blink away the feeling that was radiating inside of me.

I felt so enveloped by the intensity of this feeling that it scared me.

...I can only describe it as pure happiness. It was such a beautiful day

and I knew right then that I was living such a beautiful life.

I felt so much love for my family and so loved in return.

I felt peace.

♥ ♥ ♥

I remember wishing at that moment that I could pause the world

and stay there forever. But we never get what we wish, do we?

Life goes on and we can only wait until that

moment of peace flashes by and consumes us again.

And that is what peace means to me :)

Sometimes I like to pretend...

that I am someone else. Particularly:

Meryl Streep in Its Complicated

- so beautiful, accomplished, and did I mention she owns a bakery?

Mandy Moore in Because I Said So

- sweet, silly, free-spirited, and she has her own catering service!

Maggie Gyllenhaal in Stranger than Fiction

- passionate, intelligent, and ... owns her own bakery, haha.

Cameron Diaz in The Holiday

- she owns her own movie editing company anddd she's adorable

Kate Winslet in The Holiday

- her cottage in Surrey is to die for and she is just my fave!

Like really.

Actually, I want to be Kate Winslet in ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!

That being said, I would also like to be Meryl Streep in anything!

hehe.

the end ♥

Quarter-life Crisis

I hate obligations.

I mean, I know everybody does, or else they wouldn't

consider them obligatory. But I DETEST them.

I think it is mostly because I hate feeling out of control,

or like something has some sort of power over me.

For example: People were initially surprised that I stopped playing

sports. If you knew me in high school, or even before that,

you would know that my life was consumed by sports.

I lived, breathed, ate, and drank softball & volleyball.

Don't get me wrong, I love those sports with all my heart...

(my volleyball team, senior year. I'm #11)

I just felt so controlled by them.

So when I went to college, I decided that

I wouldn't let anything control me.

Another example: religion.

Many people (even those that I am really

close to) aren't aware of how religious I am,

probably because I do not attend church. The thing is,

I believe strongly in Christian ideals and I pray everyday.

I have friends that have invited me to go to church

or bible study with them, but I always refuse because I feel

that allowing social pressures to influence my religious practices

will make them feel like an obligation.

And that is the last thing I want.

So let me get to the point here:

Lately I have been really resenting the educational process.

Yes, I know, I am a college student and what college

student does not feel somewhat obligated to attend school?

Some people say that college cannot be an obligation

because nobody is actually forcing us to go,

but I beg to differ.

All our lives, we have been told that we won't succeed in life

unless we go to college (and now, grad school?).

And it goes without saying that we all want to

succeed in life; to be happy. College is just the means to an end.

So, in essence, college is an obligation.

Sometimes I can't help but

to feel so stifled by my

educational environment.

I am no artist, but I know I have some artistic blood

flowing through my veins and I am constantly searching for

creative outlets. Recently, my favorites have been

baking (duh!), coloring in my coloring book (freakishly therapeutic),

painting my nails, reading, and watching movies (wishing I could make them).

I just feel this overwhelming urge to create,

but an inability to do so.

Why can't I succeed in life by doing these things?!

(This question is purely rhetoric. I know that "success" in

this society is determined by financial stability, which cannot

be achieved by painting your nails all day).

But a girl can dream, right?

I think I am just getting antsy because the end of my

educational career is now within reach

and I am so anxious to finish.

I just want so badly for my life to have meaning,

and to one day feel as though I am doing

exactly what I want to be doing,

precisely what I am supposed to be doing,

and only what I was born to do.

(me & papá)

And I am hoping that that day will come sooner rather than later...

Gettin' Fancy

If you look at my list of 101 Things on the left sidebar,

you will notice that you can now click the goals

that have been crossed off to read my entry for it.

Yay :)

P.S. I stole the idea from Bryan ♥

He is clever sometimes.