Someday

Santiago, Chile

Someday I'll be living in a big ol' city...

Sparkles, Silence, and Music.

I have a few updates for you :)

First of all, I accomplished a goal:

#083: Get another piercing.

People are pretty split about tattoos/piercings. 

Some view them as vile and assert that they would never vandalize their body with one.

Others see them as works of art or a form of self-expression. I am one of the latter.

Before Friday, I had 6 piercings. Now I have eight -- and I don't plan to stop any time soon. 

I don't mean to lead you to believe that I am some extremist or hippie...

My take on piercings/tattoos is much more subtle than that haha.

My dad is an artist who works for Disney and my mother's business/hobby 

is making jewelry so you can't blame me for admitting that...

I just love sparkly things!!! 

I love magic and fantasy and glitter and so why wouldn't I choose to decorate my body 

with jewelry and artwork? I like a classy look, though -- only clear austrian swarovski crystal for me

(mama has taught me well!). I am also seriously researching dermal piercings.

One of my sisters has dermals on her lower back (back dimples) and I think they

are really pretty. I would love to have some extra glitz. 

In regards to tattoos, I plan to have (at least) three before I turn thirty. 

I already have body parts and designs chosen. Not exactly sure what I am waiting for...

Money? Cajones? Inspiration?

Get a tattoo is also a goal on my Day Zero Project so rest assured that 

I will get at least one before my project ends (July 22, 2012). 

Anyway. Drumroll please!!! 

Emily went with me to get pierced, of course. 

Emily got her cock conch conk rook pierced. (Oh Emily... hahaha) It's really cool, isn't it?!

And I just added a third hole to each ear. Hehe. Boring, I know. 

But so pretty! I just like that fact that I can have two crystals in each of my ears

at all times PLUS wear one of my mother's beautiful designs (above!).

♥ ♥ ♥

In other news, I attempted to accomplish goal #074: Spend an entire day without speaking.

Let's just say that was a huge crock! I have clearly underestimated my constant need

to open my fat mouth! I cannot stay silent to save my life.

I kept forgetting and speaking, thus prolonging the 24 hour period in which 

I was supposed to refrain from speaking. By the third day of silence, I was going crazy.

I gave up on that for now, but don't worry, I will go back to it when I have 

gained strength! Hahaha I know this sounds overdramatic, but man. 

You try spending a weekend with your boyfriend (who, by nature, can't even understand

me when I speak in perfect English) without wanting to pull out your hairs.

(hehe love you B)

♥ ♥ ♥

Oh! I almost forgot! I am also in the process of accomplishing goal

#090: Volunteer for a cause I care about.

I originally did not plan on blogging about this because it started out as 

an internship. Somewhere along the lines I have come to care deeply about

this organization, what they are trying to accomplish, and what I can do 

to help them. I "work" for SBYMA, the Santa Barbara Youth Music Academy. 

SBYMA is a non-profit organization that operates something like an after-school

music program. Students can sign up to take private lessons in ANY instrument,

to sing in a choir, or to be placed in a band. That's right, they place kids in bands,

and the kids actually go out and have gigs and make money!

The organization was founded by a great person/musician/father and is somewhat

of a family business. Although SBYMA is overseen by a group of business executives,

you just can't ignore the heart that goes into its daily operations.

My sisters and I were raised playing sports and I will always remember

the times spent on the softball diamond as some of the most memorable, most

character-building, most treasured times of my life. 

I strongly believe that all children should have a place they can go where they will be

 surrounded by family, friends, and positive role models; a place where dedication, growth, 

and hard work are valued. Oh and I guess they can have fun too. HAH.

I go into SBYMA's office every morning and do a lot of administrative activities.

I never would have thought something like this could be so fulfilling. 

Yes, waking up at 7 AM is a pain in the you know what, but

the knowledge that the work I am doing has the potential to make an impact

on a young person's life (PLUS A SOY VANILLA LATTE FROM STARBUCKS)

keeps me going through the day with a smile.

That is all for now :)

Go do something for something/someone you believe in :)

Feeling GLAMOURous

I am totally obsessed with magazines. Always have been, always will be.

There is just something about the sleek design, shiny pictures, and 

wave of new, exciting information that keeps me coming back! 

When I was in high school I was literally convinced I would one day become editor of Seventeen Magazine. I actually emailed Atoosa Rubenstein (the editor at the time) and asked her for advice! 

(I tried to find the email, but to no avail). 

Atoosa is the person who really got me into magazines. She is this strong, powerful woman

who was always talking about girl power, leadership, being whoever you wanted to be, and loving yourself exactly as you are. I was so moved by her passionate words that I thought I could follow in her 

footsteps and work for a national publication like Seventeen, where I would have the opportunity

to reach out to young women and inspire them the way she inspired me. 

Actually, I had a dream a few weeks ago in which I met her at a party 

and shook her hand. Like the nerd I am, I was so excited to go home and blog about 

how I accomplished goal #057: Shake hands with a celebrity.

 I actually felt sad when I woke up and realized it was just a dream, haha! 

Anyway. I stopped reading Seventeen because it started to seem really cheesy and superficial

(still unsure if that was because I had passed the age of 17 or because there was a new editor).

My new magazine of choice is GLAMOUR.

Have you seen the September issue? IT IS HUGE! 

I was so excited when I grabbed it at the grocery store! 

Soo if you're wondering, hehe, the point of this rambling blog entry is that I accomplished goal

050. Write a Letter to the Editor 

-- of anything.

And, as you can assume, I chose to write a letter to the editor of GLAMOUR. 

This issue came at a time when I really needed it.

I just sat in my room for two days (Yeah! It took me two days!!!)

 and devoured all of the advice they could muster up about 

beauty, fashion, health, guys, careers, and everything else under the sun. 

They also have this section called "Hey it's OK" (roommates of 6799 Trigo, 

you know what I'm talking about!) that I am particularly fond of. 

Sooo, I thought it would be nice of me if I finally wrote them a little letter of praise. 

Soooo, I did.

Soooooo... the end :)

♥

He Wishes for the Cloths of Heaven

Had I the heaven's embroidered cloths,

Enwrought with golden and silver light,

The blue and the dim and the dark cloths

Of night and light and the half-light,

I would spread the cloths under your feet:

But I, being poor, have only my dreams;

I have spread my dreams under your feet;

Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

- William Butler Yeats, 1899

♥

Dear Marcella

Speaking of class assignments...

One day in 10th grade, my pre-calculus/trigonometry

teacher instructed everybody in the class to write a letter to our

future selves. She collected our finished letters and promised to mail

them to us in five years. Much to my surprise, she actually did.

First of all, I promise I am NOT going to start blogging about every

school assignment that I thought was cool... so quit yer whinin' (HannahB).

I just thought it was relevant to share this because one of the

items on my Day Zero Project list is to

#052: Write a letter to my future self.

Reading the letter that my 15-year old self wrote

inspired me to complete this goal. I am setting up an email to

be sent to myself in exactly five years with my new letter

attached. Here are the two letters:

♥ ♥ ♥

15-Year Old Marcella to 20-Year Old Marcella (unedited):

February 1, 2005: first period

Well this is a pretty cool thing for a teacher to do. Ms. Solis, my trig/precal teacher, has just assigned the class to write a letter to ourselves which she will mail to us in 5 years. So, I am now 15 and 10 days. Which means when I get this back, I should be 20 years old.

That number used to seem so far off but now I know just how close it is. I mean, 15 used to sound really old to me. Actually, it still does! 15 just seems like the age of the classic teenager. You know, the one you see on tv shows and in movies. She's mature and loves spending money and hates school and hates her parents and has a perfect boyfriend and is running for prom queen. It's sort of ridiculous, really. When I was really young, I seriously thought I would be like that. Everybody says that life is not like tv, but you see this so much that you think, "they have to get these ideas from somewhere". Well now I am officially 15 and I am proud to say that I now know you can't predict your life or compare it to others'. Everybody is different, had different families, environments, rules and expectations. Two people can never be exactly alike. So when we set standards for ourselves, the only thing we should look at is who we are. Then it is up to our determination to see how far we can push our goals.

So what are my goals? Well I graduate when I'm 17 so in college I will be 18, 19, 20, and 21. So the Marcella that is reading this now is a junior in college. If the 15 year old Marcella could choose any college, it would be Yale. But let's be realistic now. I suppose I may be at any 4 year university. Preferably in California. Jobs? Well currently (2005) my sisters and I have started a business where we dress as Disney princesses and entertain at parties. I hope that lasts a long time, but I wouldn't want that to be my real job. I hope to be working close to Journalism. Where is the Seventeen magazine headquarters, anyway? Sigh. Probably somewhere in New York. But I wouldn't last there. My ♥ belongs in California.

I love where I live and I don't want to move. I want to stay at GHS. Well, I did. If I could choose I would go to a private school. Because I love the uniforms. haha I know, what a freak. But I think they're cute. But I don't think we'll move anytime soon, because we're doing construction. My mom says we should have a pool by summer. YES! I just gotta cross my fingers.

Well, 20 year old Marcella, I hope life has come to be great. It may not be what you expected, but, really, what is?I will try my best to make good decisions that will make you happy. Its kinda crazy to think that what i do and the choices i make now have all affected you and made you what you are today. I just hope its something you can be proud of.

♥ always, the 15 year old you.

20-Year Old Marcella to 25-Year Old Marcella:

April 8, 2010

Dear 25-year old Marcella,

If you are alive, that means the world didn't come to an end in December 2012. That is nice to know. Moving on, YOU ARE OLD! No seriously. 25???? People have families at age 25! People have careers! Lady Gaga is only 24!

It is really hard for me to guess where life has taken you. The years between age 20 and age 25 are some intense transition years. It is currently Spring Quarter 2010 at UCSB. My plans for the future include: one more quarter at UCSB, study in Chile for one semester (six months), return home, and receive my Bachelor of Arts degree in the mail. Annnd that is as far as my eye can see. What is life after college? Who will I still be friends with? How will my family be? Who will be in my life and who will not be? As you can see, the 20-year old you was very uncertain about the future. And if I know you at all, you hate uncertainty. So please have pity on her.

In terms of a career, I have two major pipe dreams. The first is a career in event planning and the second is a career in the film industry, preferably in production. Oh, and there is that teeny little fantasy that includes me opening up a little bakery in Pasadena but let us put that one aside for now (haha I love how different from each other these are!). Wherever you are now, I am sure you have worked your butt off to get there and I just wanted you to know that I am very proud of you. You are not a quitter and I am going to venture to say that that is one of your best qualities.

May 2010-April 2015 are five years that you have lived and I have not. I am sure you have experienced many struggles, triumphs, laughs, tears, huge decisions, crazy nights, and wonderful surprises. I really, truly, hope you are happy wherever you are, and that you still have many hopes and dreams for your future. Even though you are 25 and suuuper old, you still have so much life ahead of you. If life is hard right now, just remember how much you have been through. Remember how strong you are and remember how great, loving, and supportive all of the people in your life are. If you reeeally wanted, you could drop everything right now. Drop out of grad school, quit your job, move to India. It is not too late to start all over. All I want is for you to be happy.

And if life right now is good, make it better! Don't ever settle. Keep dreaming, keep exploring, and keep enjoying all of the treasures that life has to offer you. Oh and keep baking please. It makes you happy.

Love, 20-year old Marcella ♥

Sometimes I like to pretend...

that I am someone else. Particularly:

Meryl Streep in Its Complicated

- so beautiful, accomplished, and did I mention she owns a bakery?

Mandy Moore in Because I Said So

- sweet, silly, free-spirited, and she has her own catering service!

Maggie Gyllenhaal in Stranger than Fiction

- passionate, intelligent, and ... owns her own bakery, haha.

Cameron Diaz in The Holiday

- she owns her own movie editing company anddd she's adorable

Kate Winslet in The Holiday

- her cottage in Surrey is to die for and she is just my fave!

Like really.

Actually, I want to be Kate Winslet in ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!

That being said, I would also like to be Meryl Streep in anything!

hehe.

the end ♥

Quarter-life Crisis

I hate obligations.

I mean, I know everybody does, or else they wouldn't

consider them obligatory. But I DETEST them.

I think it is mostly because I hate feeling out of control,

or like something has some sort of power over me.

For example: People were initially surprised that I stopped playing

sports. If you knew me in high school, or even before that,

you would know that my life was consumed by sports.

I lived, breathed, ate, and drank softball & volleyball.

Don't get me wrong, I love those sports with all my heart...

(my volleyball team, senior year. I'm #11)

I just felt so controlled by them.

So when I went to college, I decided that

I wouldn't let anything control me.

Another example: religion.

Many people (even those that I am really

close to) aren't aware of how religious I am,

probably because I do not attend church. The thing is,

I believe strongly in Christian ideals and I pray everyday.

I have friends that have invited me to go to church

or bible study with them, but I always refuse because I feel

that allowing social pressures to influence my religious practices

will make them feel like an obligation.

And that is the last thing I want.

So let me get to the point here:

Lately I have been really resenting the educational process.

Yes, I know, I am a college student and what college

student does not feel somewhat obligated to attend school?

Some people say that college cannot be an obligation

because nobody is actually forcing us to go,

but I beg to differ.

All our lives, we have been told that we won't succeed in life

unless we go to college (and now, grad school?).

And it goes without saying that we all want to

succeed in life; to be happy. College is just the means to an end.

So, in essence, college is an obligation.

Sometimes I can't help but

to feel so stifled by my

educational environment.

I am no artist, but I know I have some artistic blood

flowing through my veins and I am constantly searching for

creative outlets. Recently, my favorites have been

baking (duh!), coloring in my coloring book (freakishly therapeutic),

painting my nails, reading, and watching movies (wishing I could make them).

I just feel this overwhelming urge to create,

but an inability to do so.

Why can't I succeed in life by doing these things?!

(This question is purely rhetoric. I know that "success" in

this society is determined by financial stability, which cannot

be achieved by painting your nails all day).

But a girl can dream, right?

I think I am just getting antsy because the end of my

educational career is now within reach

and I am so anxious to finish.

I just want so badly for my life to have meaning,

and to one day feel as though I am doing

exactly what I want to be doing,

precisely what I am supposed to be doing,

and only what I was born to do.

(me & papá)

And I am hoping that that day will come sooner rather than later...